


Grey Wizards

by KatHarkness_Katara



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Humor, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-24
Updated: 2015-03-24
Packaged: 2018-03-19 11:50:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3609081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatHarkness_Katara/pseuds/KatHarkness_Katara
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ever seen those stories where Harry declares himself Grey, and thus totally neutral? Yeah...I don't think that's likely either. This is what REALLY happens when Voldemort meets a Grey family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Grey Wizards

**Author's Note:**

> This was the product of a late night thought, after a few too many grey!Harry fics.

Mr and Mrs Greengrass and their two daughters Daphne and Astoria (home from Hogwarts for the school holidays) sat together in the drawing room partaking of high tea. They idly chatted about such meaningless matters as the Quidditch league and the latest fashions. They hardly even stirred from their tranquillity when the door was slammed open to admit a steaming furious Dark Lord Voldemort.

"Greengrass! You _will_ side with me!" Voldemort declared.

Mr Greengrass set his teacup down with a slight _clink_. "I'm terribly sorry, but I can't do that. The House of Greengrass is traditionally Grey and thus neutral in any Light/Dark conflicts. My apologies, but I cannot take sides."

A vein ticked in Voldemort's bald head. Mrs Greengrass topped up her cup from the teapot. Daphne nibbled delicately on a scone. Astoria took a sip of tea.

"GREENGRASS!" Voldemort exploded. "IF YOU ARE NOT FOR ME, YOU ARE AGAINST ME! WHY ARE YOU SO-CALLED GREY WIZARDS SO INCAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING THAT SIMPLE CONCEPT?!"

"Ah, well, if that is the case, that is completely different," Mr Greengrass replied calmly. "If the traditions of my House are to be ignored, this will take quite some thought. There must be a conclave of the Grey, at least, before any action either way can be taken, and-"

"ARE. YOU. WITH. ME. OR. WILL. YOU. DIE?!"

* * *

An hour later, the Dark Mark shone above the manor, four corpses gently cooling inside.

**Author's Note:**

> The Greengrasses are one of the most commonly portrayed “grey” families. Yeah, so it ends badly, but seriously, what would Voldemort really do?


End file.
